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Time.

Time, liquid and cynic, like a poison; is thieving your eyes from mine, with shrieks ripped apart and hurled like a sheet of so many words written with blood, only to be contaminated with the presence of one fault line. With tears buried inside to barren lands of my soul, I sense your eyes flowing away.

A child, sniveling, screams that he loves you, as if his small bird that just released her last breath. You don't hear him, and keep on breaking apart our city of dreams we built with our hands, together, with rocks mischievously stolen from fortresses. The bruises on his chest, closer to the left, you use as a cherry on your pie.

I smuggle my eyes from your gaze, from which a hungry, unkempt soul exudes; a soul I coddled as much as my mortal flesh could. In this cold October evening, my core ruptures and falls upon the earth we once gazed in bliss; as you stare through me.

The sun hastily falls into the arms of nobody, dragging my dreams along. She becomes a silhouette in the west, soon to be ethereal like you, me and this city.

You have your own dreams that you keep in a box I had never seen before, dreams you want to follow, their taste sweeter than hearing me inhale. Warmer than my hands.

You run to east's hidden treasures, you run to grasp your dreams.
You run to east, and I lose you - I'm no longer a point of interest, I'm the point that drew the line of your interests.

In an unkown flat, with the melody of a known crisis, I lose myself.

The doom of any two souls that have claimed that they were one once.

Separation.




Amid the dead bottles, once containing the wine we drank in the light of angels and lust of demons; lies a heart that has forgotten to beat.
©2008-2009 =falathiel
:iconfalathiel:

Author's Comments

Turkish "Grammar And Narration" (rough translation of the class name) class assignment. The class teacher being the person that started me writing. <3

Subject was writing about the feeling a poem gave us. Poem being one of Cemal Sureya's, it's Turkish so won't be linked here.

Well, as you see, it was about a break-up.


It's in General fiction because there's something wrong with Romantic Fiction category. Or they don't want me in there, I don't know. :lmao:

Edit, added one sentence to make the west - east metaphor standing out easier.

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 1 1 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconout-of-spite:
oh wow!

I so love reading some "prose" type pieces from you. Are you going to write more like this?

It truly is stunning
gorgeous
more than my mere words can describe.

--
~*~We Survive What We Can't Change~*~
:blackrose:Regrets are mistakes you don't learn from:blackrose:
Surrender to the Truth: [link]
Believe the Lie: [link]
:iconfalathiel:
You do? :blushes:

Well, I don't know, if somehow I get the "inspiration", why not... :giggle:
If only you guys knew Turkish... It's so much better in Turkish hehe :D

Your words of the kindest souls
dipped in a blooming green
makes my heart shine with songs of mischievous sirens
even beyond your imagination so vast and ethereal

=P

--
mesele esir düşmekte değil;
teslim olmamakta bütün mesele...
--
Raw intensity lies in...
silence.
:iconheaven-canwait:
I just decided to write a prose piece into this 'Devious Thoughts?' Commentary box, because...

I mean, you'll disagree, but please, just please, this is written by a true genius! [ Hey, what's this tear making in my eye? ]
You're so-ho-ho much over me with your poetry, I realized once again. [ Starts with your english ] . . . what you described there, oh my god.

I cannot decide which part of this had been my favourite because from the first to the last time I've been staring at the screen, trying to catch my breath. What did you do? Ate our muses for breakfast? ;)

This 'style' is you. All of this. The prose thing. The language you use. Nobody would go tell 'Hey, she's 14 only' or something (you are 14, right? xD Hey, when is your birthday?) - I didn't believe Eliza when she said that.
Every single line expresses so much! ... I'm losing myself in this piece, really... :heart: :faint:

The last so to speak stanza kicked ass as well ... aww... [ I won't go on writing tonight... I feel miserable now xD ]

--
    And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music ♥

    =RawEm0tion - Curious?
:iconmetris:
Fikrimden geceler yatabilmirem
Bu fikri başımdan atabilmirem
Neyleyim ki sene çatabilmirem

Ayrılık, ayrılık aman ayrılık
Herbir dertten olar yaman ayrılık

Uzundur hicrimden gara geceler
Bilmirem men gidim hara geceler
Vuruptur gelbime yara geceler

--
Please visit my gallery and leave a comment.


*Metris
:iconout-of-spite:
yes, I do!

lol well then I'll hope that you get inspired to write some more like this

:blush:
you are such a doll! Maybe one day I'll learn Turkish and we'll write a collab like that :lmao:

--
~*~We Survive What We Can't Change~*~
:blackrose:Regrets are mistakes you don't learn from:blackrose:
Surrender to the Truth: [link]
Believe the Lie: [link]
:iconthetrainingartist:
Awesome =D :worship:

I like it alot, it was kinda like a story and a poem... Without to much rhyme, but almost with a rhythm. :iconthinkingplz: Very well done. Excellent work again.

--
Thetrainingartist
:iconfalathiel:
Lol - Yes, I disagree! >< It ain't no work of some genius! xD

And it's not that unique, you know :lmao: :D But I'm definitely euphoric that you think like this. :D

And you are right about that this style is me. :D Prose poetry. :D Baudelaire style, only Istanbul-inspired rather than Parisienne, and I'm not even as talented as Baudelaire's pinky toes. :lmao:

(Yeah lol :D Mah b-day is on 28 March (94) :D)

OMG NO! :ohnoes: Go write! xP

--
mesele esir düşmekte değil;
teslim olmamakta bütün mesele...
--
Raw intensity lies in...
silence.
:iconfalathiel:
Aww! :blushes: Don't be so kind! XD

Thanks so so much ^^ :hug:

And that emote... :lmao:

:iconthinkingplz: shall be the flag of our yet-to-arise dorkness kingdom. xD

--
mesele esir düşmekte değil;
teslim olmamakta bütün mesele...
--
Raw intensity lies in...
silence.
:iconthetrainingartist:
I know right xD :lol: :lmao:

It is a great idea :worship: =D xD

--
Thetrainingartist

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October 21, 2008
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